COMMENTARY: Finding a Scapegoat Cheats Kids of Life’s Lessons

c. 2000 Religion News Service (Tom Ehrich is a writer and computer consultant, managing large-scale database implementations. An Episcopal priest, he lives in Durham, N.C.) (UNDATED) As a computer guy, I try to keep up with modernity. For one thing, I enjoy the gadgets. But no amount of modernity awareness prepares me for what I […]

c. 2000 Religion News Service

(Tom Ehrich is a writer and computer consultant, managing large-scale database implementations. An Episcopal priest, he lives in Durham, N.C.)

(UNDATED) As a computer guy, I try to keep up with modernity. For one thing, I enjoy the gadgets. But no amount of modernity awareness prepares me for what I see on arriving at my son’s baseball game.


The Green Dinos (ages 6-8) are in the field, but my boy isn’t behind the plate as catcher. A coach from the opposing team is catching. What’s up?

“Kids can’t play catcher any longer,” says my wife. “A kid got hit in the mouth, and his mother is suing the league.”

I am stunned. Outrage will come in a few minutes. Then sarcastic humor, that wonderful mask for helplessness. I might even chase down the rumor. But at this instant, I am simply stunned.

Too many lawyers, I think. Too many universities trying for the easy buck by churning out JDs. Too many parents undermining their children’s futures by protecting them from scrapes and consequences. Too many people who use misfortune to snag a fortune. Too much blaming and not enough teaching. Too many adults trying to find a life through their children. Too much greed.

It’s unfair, of course, to blame the entire legal profession because a few lawyers can’t get real work. Most parents wouldn’t think of bankrupting a youth sports league because their darling took a foul tip in the face mask. This is an anomaly, like the gunfire that erupted at an adjacent basketball court last summer. If modernity teaches nothing else, it is that you can’t let anomalies run your life.

Still, I think of the poor boy who took a ball in the face. The blow couldn’t have done much damage, thanks to his face mask and the hitter’s weak swing. But even if it did hurt, so what? Sports entail bruises. Life entails bruises. That’s one reason we encourage kids to play sports, to help them get more resilient. When they do get hurt, children need comfort, not lawyers.

What horrible lesson has this child now been taught? That he is entitled to a life in which there are no bruises? That pain is a mistake? That someone should pay for such a mistake? That life is about assigning blame and retaliating? That the best response to suffering is inflict more pain?


There’s nothing new about wanting to shift one’s pain onto someone else. The customer who sued McDonald’s for serving her hot coffee hot is merely proof that the “law of retaliation” is grounded deep in human history. So is the institution of the “scapegoat,” that poor animal which bore the community’s frustrations into the wilderness.

No matter that Jesus contradicted lex talionis and taught that “an eye for an eye” isn’t the way to attain justice or deal with misfortune. No matter that Jesus urged people to support each other in time of trouble, not seek an opening for personal gain or vengeance. No matter that basic psychology says, “Take responsibility for your behavior and learn from mistakes and misfortune.”

It is a fundamental instinct to make the pain of life go away by blaming someone else. Losers would rather assign blame than learn from experience. Victims, if given a chance, tend to create new victims. Finding a convenient scapegoat is easier than making better choices.

So it is that Green Dino dads turn frustration into sarcasm. Let’s sue the league, says the former catcher’s father, for “mental anguish” caused by their caving in to one misguided parent. Time for an “alienation of affection” lawsuit, says another. When tonight’s umpire changes his calls depending on which coach yells loudest, the cry goes up, “Call the lawyers!”

Baseball will survive. The next Carlton Fisk will just have to learn gritty play somewhere else. The Green Dinos will disband in a few weeks and go on to the rest of life. They probably won’t even remember the anomaly of a grown-up playing catcher. The Dinos’ former catcher is just as happy playing center field.

But somewhere is a lad who has been taught the wrong lesson about life. He is the victim here. He needs to learn how to deal with pain and failure, not transfer them to someone else.


KRE END EHRICH

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